The Grace Whisperers

A few months ago I was reading two similar books at the same time: The Present Future by Reggie McNeal (I need to get back to going through this in my posts, I know) and The Shaping of Things To Come. I became so excited about what I was reading in The Present Future that I completely forgot that I had not finished the other book until recently. So I went and got an oil change and started reading through it again.

I found myself rereading a chapter that starts with the story of the man that inspired the movie The Horse Whisperer. This man grew up in Montana on a ranch and several times over experienced the traditional way of breaking wild horses. After seeing how this traditional way was a pain to ranchers and obviously not fun for the horses, he wondered if there could be a different way to tame wild stallions. He noticed during his observances that wehnever a horse was separated from the herd and left to wander alone in the mountains it often became sick, even to the point of near-death. This left him wondering that if these animals had such a powerful, innate instinct for connection, that this instinct could be used to tame them.

This is how he developed the idea of horse whispering. He would get into the corral with the untamed mustang and would stay as far away as possible without leaving. He refused any eye contact between him and the horse. He would then move slowly away from the horse with his head down. Even though the horse would snort and pound the earth and circle the corral, he would still not even acknowledge its presence. However, within an hour, he would have the wild mustang saddled and carrying a rider quite happily. The secret is this: these wild horses need contact with others so much, they would rather befriend their enemy than be left alone. The sad thing is that even though this man showed the Montana ranchers a better way to tame these horses, most ranchers still do it the traditional way.

The writers of The Shaping Of Things To Come compare this to the church. Even though the Horse Whisperer had discovered a better way of taming horses - by listening to them - the old Montana horsemen won't budge. "They've been braking horses their way for generations. Why should they change now?" In the same way, traditional methods of evangelizing non-Christians have usually included "bludgeoning them into a recognition of how broken they are. To crush their spirit. To tear them down and bring them to their knees." The authors then give an analogy about Charley and Sara (from a man named Gene Greitenbach), which is great. Charley and Sara hang out together, but Charley sees too many of Sara's faults to be romantically interested in her. One day it dawns on him:

The way to help Sara is to date her. If we were to go out, my strengths would rub off on her, and she would be far better off for it. It will require sacrifice on my part, but it's the least I can do. Charley marches up to Sara's door with a book entitled 100 Things Sara Needs to Change in Order to Become a Real Person. He rings the doorbell. When she answers, he shoves the book in her face and states, "I've decided it would be best for you if we date. When you finish reading this, I'll be waiting in my truck!"

Traditional ways of doing evangelism don't work anymore. It isn't enough to just shove a tract in someone's face or go door-to-door and make evangelism cold calls. Here are some mistakes that churches make when it comes to evangelism:

1. Telling people to make friendships with non-Christians specifically to "win them to Christ". As Rob Bell says, if love has an agenda, is it really love? We should be making friendships with people who don't know Jesus because we are honestly interested in their lives and want to have them as a friend - not to get them to come to church.

2. Believing that conversion is a one-time sudden event. People don't come to Jesus very often in a dramatic instant conversion, a la Paul in Damascus, anymore. As Brian McLaren says, we need to "count conversations, not conversions." A 1992 study in England found that over 70 percent of those who became Christians during that time did so gradually, not suddenly. In fact the report said that the average time for someone to convert to Christianity was four years. Four years! I can't think of any model of evangelism right now that includes a four-year window for evangelism.

3. Viewing conversion as the final product in someone's life. Conversion is a beginning, not an ending - yet we in the church tend to work really hard at trying to get people to come to Christ, but when they do become a Christian, we move on to the next "project". We need to develop ways to help those who have just become God-followers grow in their relationship with Him. This includes mentoring, accountability, and more.

Does the church have the guts to stop "taming wild horses" the traditional way and begin to whisper grace into people's lives, or will we continue to break people's spirits to get them to convert because that's the way we've always done it?