YouTube has a lot of really dumb stuff on it. Mostly involving cats. :D (I watch anyways)
But sometimes you see a Youtube video that shakes you to your very core. In the below video, a comedian talks about a tragic situation in his life that involved his two year old daughter. At the same time, he was being invited to the Tonight Show to be the comedian and then invited back because he did so well. So on one hand his professional life is booming - he's funny, he's moving up in the comedy world. On the other hand, his personal life is falling apart - his daughter is sick with cancer, he has medical bills to pay, his car is about to repossessed. So he talks about how his material started getting darker and darker due to what was going on in his life but his agent told him he needed to keep it light and funny because that's what people want to hear.
It's a heartbreaking story. And it's hard to watch a man break down when he's supposed to be "entertaining" the audience. The audience is kind to him though, which makes things better.
All of this reminded me of the ministry "profession." In a similar fashion, a minister who is up on stage, whether preaching or leading music or whatever, is supposed to keep it together. They are seen as the experts in God and how to live the Christian life, so their job is to reassure the congregation that it can be done, that all you need to do is follow these certain steps or read this certain Bible passage or sing these kind of songs, and everything will be just fine. Keep it light, keep things joyful, point to the blessings and the promises in the Bible.
We don't want to see the person up on stage struggling. We certainly don't want them to let us down by showing that they aren't perfect, that not everything in their life is peachy, that they wrestle with doubt, that bad things happen to them, that they don't have all the answers, that their prayers sometimes seem to fall on deaf ears, that their family members get cancer, that they have fights with their spouse, that they are tempted, that they take medication for depression, that some days they don't feel like praying, that they question their calling, that they have insecurities...that they are human.
Is it any wonder that the pressures of acting like one has everything together all the time leads to an alarming number of ministers quitting their profession, leaving the church altogether?
Just some thoughts rattling around in my brain. I don't have the answer. But I do know that I struggle with some of the above stuff. And I try not to let those things leak into what I do on Sunday mornings. But sometimes they do. And I think that it is as much my responsibility to not act like a superhuman Jesus Junior as it is for people to let me be who God has called me to be: a flawed human who is looking to Jesus for strength, hope, healing, and redemption.
3 comments:
Terrific commentary, Adam! And a great tie-in with the video. I resonate with every observation you made! As Tony said, "there's no book to tell you how to do this". That's why authentic, unconditional friendships are so critically important for pastors. We have to carry one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. Keep on keeping on, brother!
Sometimes the "servant" life is rough. When your job is to provide a service to others, people take for granted that you, too, are a person. They assume that what your service is, defines who you are even when you aren't performing that service. As the wife of a police officer, I see this very often. When non-cops talk to him it is almost always about "cop stuff". No one wants to know the person behind the service. But, also, it's hard to let people in. To let them know the real you because of the job. You've built up the wall-of-service, and if many people are let beyond that wall it can crumble. Sometimes maintaining the wall becomes as much of a job as the occupation that defines you.
I appreciate your efforts as our worship minister. I'm happy to, through the powers of the internet, know you as more than a servant. I appreciate your wife for what she has to live with as the spouse of a servant.
In my first college Lit class I was assigned Dunbar's "We Wear the Mask". It resonated with me then, as an 18-year-old, and still lingers in my mind today. Much has changed, and so have the masks, but we all wear them. Thank you for sharing what's behind the mask.
Paul Laurence Dunbar (1872-1906)
We Wear the Mask
WE wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,—
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.
Why should the world be over-wise,
In counting all our tears and sighs?
Nay, let them only see us, while
We wear the mask.
We smile, but, O great Christ, our cries
To thee from tortured souls arise.
We sing, but oh the clay is vile
Beneath our feet, and long the mile;
But let the world dream otherwise,
We wear the mask!
Wow Tiffany, thanks! I just saw this.
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